[theqoo] IF PARK BOGUM PROPOSED TO YOU, WOULD YOU TURN HIM DOWN? ’40 Y.O SINGLE’ DATING EXPERT DROPS HARSH FACTS

Q: Isn’t it difficult to match people with partners they’d find appealing?

A: Honestly, if both sides have excellent qualities, matchmaking is quite easy. They don’t even need to be exceptionally outstanding, just being “decent” by average standards is enough. In such cases, they often end up dating after just a single coffee meeting. As a matchmaker, I’d prefer if they met more people before deciding, but many couples form after one or two meetings.

On the other hand, there are challenging cases. Sometimes people get emotional, saying, “Why can’t I meet someone like that?” This makes it hard to match them. For example, high-earning men often expect women of considerable beauty. But these days, women also consider men’s appearances. If the man has issues like baldness or obesity or lacks basic self-care, it becomes problematic. The most important factor in dating is whether someone has metacognition (the ability to see themselves objectively). Those who understand themselves well tend to date successfully.

Q: Is the issue that most people overestimate themselves?

A: The opposite happens quite often too. Some people undervalue themselves, responding with a lack of confidence, saying, “Why would this person want to meet me?” This also makes things difficult. Even if the other party shows interest, they don’t believe it. This lack of confidence stems from very low self-esteem. For such individuals, mental self-care needs to come first.

Q: What’s the typical age range of members?

A: Traditional matchmaking services are mostly for people in their mid-30s and older. However, Jiin.Love (T/N: Korean marriage matchmaking service) has members ranging from their early 20s to late 30s.

Q: Isn’t the younger generation trending toward not getting married?

A: I believe that as the number of people who choose not to marry increases, matchmaking services will actually do better. After all, someone who wants to get married shouldn’t be dating someone who is against it. It’s a waste of time and energy. Matchmaking services are efficient because they bring together people who are at least open to marriage and having children.

Of course, some people think matchmaking services are only for those who are desperate to get married immediately, but that’s not true. The focus is first on encouraging dating. Marriage should come naturally from being in a good relationship, not from meeting a few times and diving straight into marriage talks.

Q: Why do you think more people identify as single-by-choice these days?

A: Personally, I don’t think there are many true singles-by-choice. For example, if an actor like Park Bogum asked someone to marry him, would they really say no? It’s more about having high standards without wanting to put in the effort to meet them. On top of that, people think, “Would someone like that even want to date me?” and fall into despair. Their self-esteem is very low, but their ideal is too high, and they don’t want to find a middle ground.

So they console themselves with thoughts like, “I’m happy on my own anyway.” But really, isn’t there nothing more enjoyable than dating?

1. But are they Park Bogum though~

2. It’s because they are not Park Bogum that we’re not dating them. Are they that dense?

3. I’m not getting married… I hate living with others

4. Do they think that people who want to stay single hate men? Fools

5. Those idiots are running a marriage agency…? I don’t care if it’s Park Bogum or Cha Eunwoo, it’s a waste of time.